Sunday, April 15, 2007

Disconnected in Brooklyn on Craigslist: I Advised About Hair Removal on the L

It's Sunday, which means it's time for our favorite Brooklyn Craigslist Missed Connection of the week. Our selection this week doesn't disappoint, dealing with hair removal, pimples and even mentioning Charles Bukowski. Here goes:
I interjected my way into your hairlip/pimple conversation . . . - m4w

You wore a striking red and white kind of psychedelic tightly patterned blouse under a black or brown coat, you had darkish blond shoulder length hair. You were talking to your friend, a young gentleman with glasses and an impressively full beard. I was the blond guy in the long dark blue coat and light blue hat standing behind you.

Your conversation happened to absolutely hysterical, but I couldn't help but hear even if it weren't, I was pressed awkwardly close by the crowd. You remarked that the hair on your lip was in full force-- not really your everyday bland conversation on the L, I must say. I listened, but could only see the back of your head, so my imagination opened up. 'Why doesn't she wax?' I wondered . . .

"I tried waxing," you said, "but it made me break out . . . so it's either pimples or hair." So true. Actually, by this time I could see that you were disarmingly attractive, hairlip or not, so I went on to reckon that you'd still be attractive with pimples, and for that matter, perhaps even with both. That is when I couldn't not interrrupt, suggesting that, with the right diet, you could have both. Not that I wasn't already interrupting the whole car considering I had a messenger bike on a crowded train.

I interjected again when you guys covered the subject of the teacher with the fu-manchu mustache, and then we all spoke of Charles Bukowski's girfriend's beard, amongst other things. It was a lot to cover in just several moments. And though I was immediately prepared to ask you out right there, I was unsure of your relationship to the bearded gentleman, quite apart from the fact that I was crashing your conversation.

What I was sure of was that you have got to be pretty cool to discuss your hairlip with such refreshing nonchalance and, I considered, damnit if I wouldn't like to have a drink with someone like that. Here's the funny thing: You don't really have a hairlip.
No matter how active one's imagination may be, it is truly impossible to make up material like this.


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